Valid

I once had a boss who almost never gave positive feedback to me. He seemed to love heaping loving praise on a few people. I worked really hard in that job, for a long time, trying to please him. However, this same boss did not often give negative feedback either. The one time that he did give me negative feedback, he communicated it in quite a humiliating fashion. He did not seem too mad, but he made me feel stupid.

That job was very important to me from the start, but receiving praise from him was a goal I wanted badly. I felt that if I could join the “favorites” group, everything would be fine. He would recognize that I worked really hard and did a good job. I was never able to join that group of favorites, but I did get some praise from him that made me feel ten feet tall.

In the second chapter of the Gospel of John, Jesus performs the miracle of turning the water into wine. The interesting part of it to me is that he was careful that only a select few at the time knew about what he had done. He could have performed the transformation in front of all the guests at the wedding. Everyone would have been stupefied. Instead, his mother, the servants, and his disciples were the only ones who witnessed it.

Seeking validation has been an overall theme in my life. It can be a very tough battle. I think it is a pretty common theme for most people in one way or another. Jesus seems to have been immune to it. He did not try to get anyone to praise him. He knew his true identity.