Friday, February 1, 2013

To Wait

I started to feel a little anxious. The opportunity looked good, possibly even attainable. Unfortunately, they wanted one thing that I lacked. They needed me to send them a transcript. Having been around several different colleges, I had the feeling that this might not be an easy or quick process. Recalling previous experiences with long lines, I requested that they send me the transcript in the mail, thinking: “only 4 miles away, how long could it take?” Then I started to wait.

Five days came and went with no transcript. With my anxiety rising, I decided to call. The person at the office told me that it usually only takes 5 minutes to get one in person. The next day, I was on campus and contemplating whether to go or wait. I listened to an internal voice speaking of continuous chaos around the bend. I wondered if it had gotten lost in the mail (which has never happened to me before), or if the days I might have to wait longer could cost me this job opportunity. After all the contemplation, I let my anxiety win and I went by the office. There was no line and it took about 5 minutes.

About an hour after I got home and began the process of completing my application, I heard the mail slot close and saw the letter containing my transcript fall to the linoleum. 

Waiting is a theme in the Bible. Esau sold his birthright because he could not wait long enough. Abraham could not wait for God to give him a son with his wife Sara, so he had a child with Hagar. The Israelites in the desert could not wait long enough, so they made a statue. Despite the difficulty, the prophets in the Old Testament speak very often of the virtue of waiting on God. In Luke 12, Jesus told his disciples not to worry, but to wait and be ready to open the door.

Even though I believe the promises of God, it is still hard to wait! How do you wait? How do you silence the control-seeking voice in your head?

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